Your Daily Cultural Exposure
Today's lesson is on Haiku, you know, the form of poetry with three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables The subject? Dog neutering. Sit back and enjoy...
my owner told me
we were visiting the park
I woke half a man.
-Renée
I once was studly...
SNIP SNIP- there go my testes
I want neuticles!
-Lisa B
My ancestors cry
That my children are stolen
I just want my balls
-MeltySno
never had a chance
to say goodbye, not even
one last lick for luck.
-anon
'kay - you've had your fun.
isn't this like "hide the ball"?
come on - put 'em back!
- lapietra
For the crazy cat people (you know who you are):
The cat is laughing
Alas, he is unaware
His balls are gone too
-AEther
Okay, this one is my favorite:
you may take my balls
but you won't take my power
to make you touch poop
-anon
Inspired by Kristin and zefrank.com
My Brown Baby Boy
Today marks the three year anniversary of having my dog Logan in my life. Getting him was a huge transition for me. Just one week earlier, by beloved Zero was hit by a car and had to be put to sleep. I knew right away that I needed to rescue another dog. I spent the week searching online and soon found myself at the Bridgeport Pound…. not a nice place. In this kennel was this brown dog sitting so politely, as if he was waiting for me. I slipped a leash on him and took him home.
I’d like to say that it was a smooth transition, but it was anything but. Logan was unruly, and I was emotionally unprepared for such a crazy dog. Six months of obedience training later, I found myself with a much more tolerable dog, and slowly he crept his way into my heart. He has developed into one of the sweetest, mushiest mama’s boys that you could ever meet.
He is not without his quirks:
He will not go outside in the rain. He’ll just turn around and look back at you as if to say, “you’re kidding, right?” He’s been known to hold it for days.
He also doesn’t like damp or long grass. He sticks to the little path he’s worn in the backyard.
He likes to sleep on the bed… under the covers, occasionally with his head on the pillow.
He's polite. He asks to come up on the furniture. But will then stare at you pathetically if there is something on the couch in the spot where he wants to lay (remote, phone, scrap of paper, etc.).
His toys are like his children. He’ll bring them out into the backyard like he wants to show them the view. He has also been caught herding them all up in a pile around him.
He also adores his Daddy, who I fondly refer to as my Moosie Daddy (like my baby daddy), although The Boy thinks I love the dog more than him:
Boy: Okay, if there was a fire in the house, who would you save, the Moose or me?
Girl: Well, you have opposable thumbs… You’d be able to open the door and get out yourself.
Boy: I knew it!!
The Boy also loves to serenade Logan… Have you ever seen a dog swoon? It’s a sight to see!
Nicknames:
The Moose/Moosie
Moosiepants
Moosiepaws
Brown Baby Boy (we like this one bc it reminds us of poop)
Log (his Grandma’s favorite)
In many ways, I fee like Zero gave his life so that Logan can have a good one with us. I’ll always miss Zero. Logan will never take Zero’s place in my heart, but he’s carved himself a spot of his own.
The Commutative Property of Business
I’ve been noticing something on my drive into work that strikes me odd. I have been taking a different route into work, on a road that doesn’t allow trucks. It shaves about 15 minutes off of my commute and is just so much more peaceful. I drive through this extremely wealthy area on the back roads. As I come out closer to the train station, I notice them… a sea of business men walking from their multi-million dollar homes to the station. For the most part, they’re dressed the same: blue oxford shirt, khaki or black pants, black blazer optional, black leather laptop bag, and cellphone.
I guess it should make me happy that they’re not driving their Hummers to the train station, but it just kind of makes me sad. I wonder what their lives are like, these breadwinners; what time do they get home? do they spend time with their wives and kids? are their lives like an afterschool special, or are they truly fulfilled? do they judge me, driving my beat up old Volkswagen through their pristine streets, as much as I judge them?
I think back to my workaholic days and don't miss them at all. I guess I could have been there. We may worry about money more, but I don’t envy them at all… Maybe I'm reading way too much into it.
I'm not always this bitter sounding. I'm just in a bit of a mood today...
Is there a twelve step program for flickr?
I’m a flickr addict. Ever since I was introduced to the site by Kristin, I have been a woman possessed. I uploaded close to 1,000 pictures in the first weekend, and have been going strong ever since. I guess it’s good, because I’m inspired to take more pictures, just so that I can upload them.
They even have cool little features, like the photo badge in the right column of my blog. They give you all of the code that you need to link up to their pictures. To me, that's genius because it just drives traffic to their site.
Overachiever
I got the grade for my summer class this weekend. I took Media Law, and it was a tough class. I wrote 3 papers a week, on top of a ton of reading and regular discussion posts. Did I mention the midterm and the final exams? In a 5 week class, on top of my fulltime job? I worked really hard for a professor who doesn’t seem to like to give out As. I got an A-, which is great for a professor like that and the workload. It’s the first grade I have gotten below an A since I started grad school. Is it wrong that it bothers me? I know, I know… yes.
Have you ever felt this way at work?
I have...
Does Talking about it Make you Go Blind Too?
My recent conversation with my friend Evan has made me keenly aware of the bizarre conversations that I have on a regular basis. The common denominator in all of this seems to be me... Well, and lately, it seems to be porn too.
C: yesterday, i did my final for my summer class... i'm finally done!!
E: yay!
C: i'm glad to be done with it
E: i bet
C: one of the questions on the final was to compare and contrast 3 things
C: how the eff do you do that with 3 things??
E: any three things?
E: like a duck, a sandwich and porn?
C: lol, actually…
C: porn was one of them
C: indecency, obscenity, and child porn… i really think that my prof may be a pervert
E: sounds like it
C: there were a lot of porn related things in the class
E: well it is 93% of the internet. the other 7% divided between star wars and news
C: and i couldn't really work on it much at work... would be great to be searching kiddie porn on work servers
E: did you get a list of good porn url's as homework?
C: hee hee... unfortunately, no
C: bc i totally would have gotten an A on that
E: lol
E: how'd you do on the essay?
C: i created a table with bullet points... that's the only way i could do it
E: you get a question on porn and you develop a spreadsheet?
E: heehee
C: lol! what does that say about me?
E: i guess that all depends on how you define obsecene?
The Ship has Landed
Today I got one of the items for my wedding that I am most excited about... My shoes!! How cool are these going to look under my dress?
My poor mother...
I'll do anything to keep from writing my paper...
Hit refresh and the letters change. Pretty cool, huh?
Second Annual Independence Celebration
This holiday weekend, the boy and I held our second annual Fourth of July party. This year, we held it on the third, so that everyone could recover before going back to work (except for them teacher-types). As usual, a good time was had by all. The beach was mellow that night (to our standards at least). We lit a nice fire in our new fireplace and enjoyed the fireworks show from the backyard.
Some photographic highlights:
My Favorite of the bunch, Boy, Tony, Ruthie, and Logan
Who dresses these guys?
On the night of the Fourth, The Boy and I trekked back down to the beach for the real show. Ah... the firefight was in full force. As we walked up to take our spot on the beach, there were these people digging holes in sand with shovels. We watched them as they put huge pvc piping pointing to the sky and started carrying big cardboard boxes to the site. We knew we were in for a show. We were not disappointed. These people had Grucci-caliber stuff... Amazing!
The site as we arrived
Bringing in the big boxes of explosives...
Man, I love my neighborhood!
Optional Porn
I got reprimanded by Kristin this morning about not doing an optional homework assignment on porn for my Media Law class. This was immediately after applauding me on an A that I got on a recent paper on the controversial topic of fried chicken products and the media.
K: you should put that one on your fridge. the chicken paper.
C: lol
C: unfortunately, the one about porn was optional and i didn't do it
K: chrissy! what have i told you about optional porn?
K: always take it
K: always
K: sigh
I promise I won't let you down next time. I'll never refuse optional porn again!
